Forever
by rachie raechy
Summary: Pippa's curiosity gets the best of her, resulting in Felicity demonstrating what can happen when one opens their mind to something new. Pippa/Felicity femslash


_**I am not Libba Bray, nor do I own any of her books.**_

_**This takes place somewhere after chapter fifteen of A Great and Terrible Beauty.**_

_"March 21, 1871_

_ "Today we stood among the Runes of the Oracle. Under Eugenia's guidance, we touched our fingers to them for an instant, receiving the magic. The sensation was overpowering. It was as if we could feel each other's very thoughts, as if we were one and the same."_

I raise an eyebrow. "Sounds naughty. Mary and Sarah are probably Sapphists."

"What on earth is a Sapphist?" Pippa asks, twirling her black ringlets around her finger.

"Must I tell you everything?" I scoff. "From the Greek Sappho, a lady poet who enjoyed the love of other women."

"Whatever is the matter with that?" Pippa has stopped playing with her hair. I lower my head and voice.

"Sapphists prefer the love of women to men."

Ann nervously straightens her skirts, looking down. Pippa slowly comes to understand the meaning of it, too, but not after squinting at me in confusion. "Oh my heavens," she says, "you can't honestly mean that . . . that they . . . like husband and wife . . . ?"

"Yes, exactly," I say. She finally understands. I fully expect her to ask how I know so much on the subject, but instead, Gemma asks if she may continue.

Oh, how I wish I could tell them why I have such an interest in Sapphists . . .

* * *

Pippa and I are back in our room. It is nearly one o'clock, now. Pippa's teeth are chattering and I can see her shivering in her bed from where I lay in mine.

"Fee, I am so very cold," Pippa says at the same time as I ask, "Pip, darling, are you cold?"

"Yes, very," she says, laughing.

"Would you like to have one of my covers for to-night?" I begin to rip the top cover from my bed.

"Oh, no Fee. Then _you_ would be cold." I am quiet for a moment as I try to think of a solution. A thought forms in my head, but I quickly push it out as soon as it comes. _No, Fee. That is not something you may think of. It may lead to things that should never happen.  
_

"Well, I don't know what we can do. If we wake Bridgid, I fear she shall have our heads for being awake at such a late hour," I reason.

"Mm," agrees Pip. For a while there is nothing but the sound of the clattering of her teeth. I can't bear the thought of her freezing, so I speak the thought I had earlier, the one I'd pushed away. _It is the only option,_ I assure myself.

"Pip," I begin, "the only other idea that comes to mind is sharing covers. If you would like, I could bring my blankets there and we may share . . ."

"Oh, yes, that would be lovely! Thank you, Fee," Pippa answers almost too quickly. I carry my blankets over to her bed, cover her with them, and then crawl in with her. We are lying on our sides, and her back is to me.

"Better?" I ask, daring to put an arm around her.

"Oh, yes. Much," she replies. "Thank you." Both of us fall silent, and because of her even breathing I almost think she has fallen asleep, until she speaks again. "Fee . . ."

"Yes?"

"Do you suppose there really is such thing as a Sapphist?" I let out a breath.

"Well, Pip, I do." I don't tell her what I'm really thinking: that I fear I may be one.

"Oh. Well if there are . . . how do you suppose . . . they have . . ." she begins.

"Intercourse?" I finish when she does not.

"Yes," she answers with a small sigh of relief.

"Well . . . I should think it would start out the very same as intercourse between a man and a woman."

"And what, pray, would that be?" she asks with a haughty sniff.

"Oh, dear me, Pip! Don't tell me you do not know!" I tease. "Well, it would start with a kiss!"

"Oh," she says. "I wonder if a kiss with a woman is any different than one with a man."

"I shouldn't know," I laugh, "I have never tried it!"

"Me neither," she informs me unnecessarily, "but I wonder, just the same."

"Well, I suppose the only way to know is to try it," I say.

"Mm," she agrees. We are quiet again. "I should like to know," she murmurs under her breath.

"Pardon me?" I ask, as if I haven't heard her.

"I simply said that I should like . . . to find out," she breathes.

"Well . . ." I begin hesitantly, "Would you like to . . . to try?"

"Yes," she whispers, "I would." She turns over so we are facing each other.

"Pip," I breathe. I lean forward and our lips meet, ever so gently. We hold the kiss for several seconds before Pippa pulls away.

"Oh," is all she can say.

"Well?" I ask. "Was it any different, do you suppose?"

"Yes. Much different," she answers after pondering the question for a while.

"Why, do you suppose?" I ask. She takes a while to ponder this one, too.

"I suppose it is because . . . women are men's opposites. Men are more aggressive while women are calm and rational. Mixed together they are powerful, but they cannot understand each other quite as well as one of their own sex could. Perhaps it is simply because we are . . . the same."

"That is what I thought," I agree, "but wasn't there something else? Something deeper . . . hidden in the kiss?" Pippa's brow furrows in concentration, as if she is trying to place a finger on some fleeting idea.

"I think so, but I can't remember."

"Me neither. Would you like to try again? To try to understand?" I ask.

"Yes," she whispers, wetting her lips. Our lips meet once more. This time, we do not hesitate. My lips press against hers with passion as she draws closer to me. Growing bold, I gently slip my tongue into her mouth when she opens it slightly.

"Oh!" she cries, pulling away. I have startled her.

"I am sorry Pip. I got carried away . . ."

"It's quite alright," she says, but she stays away. "What next, Fee?" Her voice has dropped to a whisper.

"Pardon?" I ask, not understanding her.

"What would they do next, Sapphists, I mean?"

"Oh. Well, I suppose . . ." I stop. "Pip, I don't believe this is something that can be explained. If you would like to know, you should have to try it for yourself. Or watch someone else . . ." I add.

"Oh." She looks away, then meets my gaze. "Would you . . . Would you show me, Fee?" she whispers. I moisten my lips.

"Are you . . . certain you want this, Pip?"

"I . . . Yes." Her breath is coming out sharper now, in quick little pants.

"All right. Now, Pip," I instruct, "there shall probably come a point where all you will wish to do is scream. You mustn't. If you do, you shall wake the entire house, and we shall be caught. I am afraid to see what shall happen then . . . So please try to keep quiet." Pippa nods, biting her lower lip. I sit up.

"What are you doing?" she asks nervously. Poor Pippa. She thinks I would leave her.

"Oh, don't worry Pip, I only mean to make this better . . ." When she sits up too, I straddle her knees and kiss her again. My lips pry hers apart gently, leaving enough room to slip my tongue in, but this time I do not. She does. Her tongue feels smooth and soft against mine, exploring each tooth, tickling the roof of my mouth.

We stand up. The floor feels icy against my feet, but Pippa's warm toes tickle mine, instantly smoothing out the goosebumps that had begun to crawl up my legs. Our bodies press together tightly and we grip each other firmly, keeping each other warm as we kiss.

Pulling away for just a moment, I gently ease her nightgown over her head and then take mine off, too. When we're both fully unclothed, I take in Pippa's body and exhale. How could I have ever had doubts about being a Sapphist? The way looking at her makes me feel, warm and fuzzy, and the wet, throbbing desire between my legs are sure signs. Ithal, or any other man, for that matter, never made me feel this way. I am sure this is what I am.

"Now what?" Pippa asks, her voice barely over a whisper. I don't answer except to close the gap between us and press my lips against hers. My hands find a place on her hips as our bodies come together. Pippa moans into my mouth as I slide one hand up her stomach to gently caress her warm breasts. My mouth leaves hers to suck at one of her nipples, teasing it to hardness with my tongue. Once I am finished with that one, I move to the other, expertly sucking with even pressure.

She can take no more. She pulls my mouth up to her lips again, but she allows me to continue fingering her nipples gently.

My other hand drags around to find a place between her legs. I gasp as I realize how wet she is, and _she _gasps at the delightful feeling of my touch at the place she has always been ashamed of, embarrassed to talk about.

"Fee!" she says, biting her lower lip. I continue to kiss her, pressing my lips to hers with a growing animal passion as my fingers gently probe her most intimate flesh. I find her clitoris with my thumb and gently move it in circular motions, eliciting startled cries of pleasure from Pippa. She becomes increasingly aroused and her moans become increasingly louder.

My kisses travel from her mouth, to her neck, to her shoulder, to her breasts and back again. She sighs contentedly. We continue to kiss passionately, desperate to keep in contact with one another.

Now for the big moment. I push her gently back onto the bed.

"Wha-" I cut her off by sticking one long finger inside her opening slightly.

"Okay?" I ask her, watching her expression turn from confusion to understanding to one of pleasure as my finger drives deeper.

"Yes! Oh, yes, Fee!" she manages to blurt out as I push in, then out. My finger slides out to make room for another.

"Ahh!" Pippa shrieks quietly as I attempt to fit two fingers into her opening.

"Are you okay?" I ask gently, but she doesn't need to answer. The tortured expression on her face has melded to one of pure bliss. As I begin to pump my fingers inside of her, I lean over to continue kissing her, trailing my lips up to her neck from the garden of curls between her legs. Her lips part in ecstasy and her violet eyes close as I begin to thrust harder with my fingers. They begin to cramp up, but I keep pushing. She must reach her climax tonight.

Pippa's eyes squeeze together more tightly as I begin to pump harder, faster. Her head thrashes to the left, then to the right, then to the left again. My thumb circles her clitoris. My other fingers continue to play with her nipple. I begin to leave my mark on her neck, kissing, sucking, and nibbling at the smooth skin I find there. It is an extremely precise blend of pleasure, and it is almost too much for Pippa. She bucks her hips wildly and cries out as she reaches her peak. Tears form at the corners of her eyes and sweat beads on her forehead and on the tip of her perfect little nose.

Pippa relaxes with a sigh. Her inner muscles clench a couple times before releasing my fingers. I look at them. They are wrinkled from being covered in her gooey liquids. I lick them off before she opens her eyes, and they taste strange: a mixture of sweet and sour that explodes in my mouth where it touches my tongue.

I crawl into the bed beside Pippa, pulling the covers over us once again. I wrap my arms around her and press my naked chest against her warm, bare back. My feet feel a wet patch on the sheets where the effects of her climax have left their mark, and I wonder what we shall have to do to hide it.

"Fee," Pippa begins between rough, ragged breaths, "do you . . . do you suppose . . . this makes us . . . Sapphists?"

"I suppose," I answer carefully, "that if you do not want to be a Sapphist, we shan't be. You may say the word and I shall put my shift on and return to my bed. We could forget all of this." Pippa thinks for a long time.

"Well, I . . ." she says, then puts into whispered words my thoughts from earlier: "When you kissed me . . . It was so very much different - better - from kissing a man . . . I believe . . . I believe I should like to be a Sapphist." I nod against her loose brown hair, take in the scent of it: roses.

"But what about . . ." Pippa begins.

"About what?"

"Everyone else."

"Why, they shall never know. It shall be our little secret. Forever."

"Forever," echoes Pippa. "Fee . . ."

"Yes, Pip, darling?"

"I should like . . . to repay you . . ." says she. I smile. I know her well enough to know that she really means it.

"Oh, Pip. Of course! But not today. We shall have more chances soon enough."

Light is streaming in from behind the curtains, illuminating the room. The first light of dawn. Pip and I haven't slept a wink all night, and we shall have dark circles under our eyes soon. My head begins to pound as a side effect from the alcohol. I'd nearly forgotten I'd had any at all until now. I sigh and snuggle closer to Pippa.

"I love you," I whisper into her ear.

"I love you, too," Pippa replies. I realize it's true. I've never truly loved anyone else. And now, Pip and I shall have a perfect future. Nothing shall ever stand in our way. Nothing - not even death itself - can part us. We shall be together forever.

If only things were that simple.

_**Thanks so much for reading and don't forget to comment!**_


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